Euphoric Fatigue (euphoricfatigue) wrote,
Euphoric Fatigue
euphoricfatigue

  • Mood:
The Infamous Shemp Hair Experiment

Objective: To have an unsuspecting Research Subject try new Shemp hair style

Equipment:

  1. Specimin, Earthling (the more intelligent, the better)

  2. Hairbrush

  3. Hair Comb
  4. Sissors (mostly for effect)

  5. Tequila (1 full bottle)

  6. 35 mm Camera or Digital Camera

  7. Restraints (In case of non compliance)
  8. Film for Camera or Battery/Charger for Digital Camera

  9. A Strong Stomach

  10. Ability to have fun

  11. Lime
  12. Drinking Glasses and/or Drinking Straws

  13. Emergency Medical Supplies

  14. A Telephone

  15. Shemp Wig

  16. Course Ground Salt
  17. Lab Assistant, to Help with Photograpy

  18. Music for Dancing

Setup:

  1. Befriend Research Subject

  2. Gain Trust of Research Subject

  3. Assemblage of Equipment

  4. Ready Camera of Choice

  5. Slice Lime into Thin Slices

  6. Fill Glasses With Tequila

  7. Music of Choice



Procedure:
  • Have Research Subject & Researchers Start Drinking Tequila
  • Start music of choice
  • When Research Subect begins to feel effects of tequila, broach subject of new hair styles.
  • If subject is apprehensive, reassure Research Subject that procedure is painless.
  • If Research Subject is still apprehensive, offer more tequila.
  • Without much fuss, gather brush, comb and sissors.
  • Calmly approach Research Specimin, and lay a reassuring hand on shoulder.
  • Reassure Research Subject that a new hairstyle is usually pain free.
  • Research Subject at this time may be very anxious.
  • Ply with more tequila if necessary.
  • Run fingers through Research Subject's hair.
  • If Research Subject is still apprehensive at this point, inform Research Subject it is better to compy then face the consequenses.
  • Point finger towards restraints
  • Drink more tequila as needed.
  • Pretend to cut Research Subject's hair.
  • Inform Research Subject that they could try less evasive procedure.
  • Gather Shemp wig.
  • Apporach Research Subject calmly with Shemp wig.
  • Place Shemp wig on Research Subject's head.
  • The more askew Shemp wig is, the better.
  • Start to giggle
  • Have Research Assistant ready camera of choice.
  • Start taking head shot photos of Research Subject for documentation.
  • Keep reassuring Research Subject they look fabulous.
  • Have Research Subject dance a little, it is easier to take photos if they are compliant.
  • Document findings
  • Submit to tljs

    Findings:
      Research Subject was quickly and easily guided to new Shemp hairstyle.

      Please see documentation
      HERE
      HERE
      HERE
      and HERE

      Respectfully Submitted, euphoricfatigue
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